Driving through the Countrysides of the UK - A Travelogue

 Driving through the Countrysides of the UK – A Travelogue

Tathagata Anuradha Mukhopadhyay

5 April 2024

We boarded an Indigo Airlines flight to London via Istanbul. Three things worth mentioning: First, for the first time in my life I took a six-and-a-half-hour long international flight where they served only one veg meal and in-flight entertainment was unavailable. I won’t feel any compunction should Indigo's International Flight licence be cancelled, simply because any foreigners travelling with this airline would think that India is a country of paupers. Second, the walk and the security check-in in Istanbul is an ordeal. A Turk bully-of-a-man started asking me why I was travelling to the UK. Since when did the Govt of the UK appoint these Turk mofos as their custodian of security? Or did he do this because I was holding an Indian passport? The bastards are pro-Pakistani and India's diplomatic relationship with Turkey is now at an all-time low (even after accepting India's aid after the recent earthquake). A piss-off experience! Third, the Turkish Airlines flight from Istanbul to London was superb, which made me rethink using it again!

Reached Heathrow Terminal 2 around 3 pm local time. We had pre-booked a car through Car Jet. Had to pay GBP 350 extra just because I wasn't carrying a credit card. They refused to keep the deposit money using a debit card.

But there were some positives. We had booked a manual Toyota Yaris but got an automatic Peugeot for the same price. At least some compensation! Everything about the car was automatic and touch panel controlled! Took some time for my old brain to get attuned. Drove to Ramada London North for the night stay. Good hotel (for GBP 58 sans breakfast). The wife was happy.

Our Hotel in London	The Peugeot 2008 that we rented

6 Apr 2024

Drove to Richmond Golf Apartment in Norfolk which was about 3 hours away. Wonderful drive to a breathtakingly verdant location. Our home was a small two-storeyed old colonial cottage amidst a lush green golf course. Terrific! Bought rations, wine and beer from the nearby market and stocked up our fridge. While walking through the footpaths (in the UK they do not call them pavements) I noticed Defibrillators hung by the roadside for medical emergencies, with clear instructions on how to use them should anyone have a heart attack! Later on, I would see them everywhere in the UK. Now that is impressive. Defibrillators are used as a First Aid kit. When would we have such facilities in India? Wifey cooked dal-rice-egg-boiled potato for dinner. Yummy... 

Our Golf Apartment at Richmond Park	View of the Golf Course from our window
Never knew grass flowered!	Defibrillators are used as First Aid kit

7 April 2024

Drove to Cambridge, which is about a 1 hr 15 min drive from where we lived. A picturesque city packed with rich history. Cambridge is a place of colleges and education. It is a quaint city with narrow alleyways, cathedrals, and a Sunday market in the city centre, which is so typical of Europe. We parked our car at the car park in a central shopping mall, then took a hop-in-hop-off bus for a city tour, and availed the trip twice over! Paisa wasool! We also ended up paying 30 pounds (over INR 3000) for parking – the reverse of Paise Wasool!  The weather was fantastic. Bright sunshine with a maximum temperature of 16 deg F. Two small trivia: a) The flow of the river Cam is controlled by flowing the water through a weir to simulate the current of the Thames so that the Cambridge University Canoeing team can practice competing with the Oxford students who practice on the Thames. b) Parker's Piece Park in Cambridge is a large public park where some of the earliest rules of football (soccer) were established, including the standardization of goalpost measurements. The park holds historical significance in the development of modern football. A day well spent. Drove back to Richmond Park in the evening.

Jack Hobbs played his cricket in this park	River Cam in Cambridge
Sunday market at the quaint City Square	One of the 31 colleges in Cambridge

8 April 2004

In the morning, we first went to the local post office to post the extra key to the car renting company, which we had carried with us mistakenly. The PO is two counters in a stationery store. We had to buy a padded envelope - which we got right there. Why don't we use this concept in India – having small POs in stationery stores? We then drove to a quaint little town called Dereham, which is 14 miles away from where we were living. Wifey found this through the internet. It had a decent shopping centre. We bought some food and wine and went back. Spent a lazy afternoon in our Golf Apartment. Went for a long walk in the evening, in the crisp, chilly weather. The days in the UK were getting longer by the day. The dusk does not start settling until 8 pm.

Dusk settling at Richmond Park
And miles to go before I sleep…

9 April 2004

We drove to the historic city of Lincoln, which is about two hours' drive from where we are located. I had been to this place way back in 2006 or so when I was with the L&T. Siemens' gas turbine manufacturing unit is located here. I had fond memories, so I wanted to take Wifey there. Lincoln is famous for its cathedral and castle, which are on a hilltop. Today, we first got a taste of the bitter English weather. It was drizzling incessantly, and the chill was bone-biting. We spent some time on the hilltop in a tryst with the medieval history of Churches. If you are reading this, I would suggest reading Ken Follet's Pillars of the Earth to revisit the era when Churches and Cathedrals were built all across Europe. One interesting trivia: A major portion of the famous Tom Hanks starrer Da Vinci Code was filmed in the Lincoln Cathedral. We gorged on an authentic Greek Lunch at the picturesque city centre before heading back to Norfolk. Midway through, I parked the car by the roadside for a power nap - something I consistently do on long drives when I feel drowsy. 

The Lincoln Cathedral	A part of the Lincoln Castle
Cobble-stoned lane of Lincoln	River Witham flowing through Lincoln City Center

 

10 April 2024

On holidays we like to spend some days doing nothing. This was such a day. We just lazed around, then drove to Dereham marketplace late in the morning to pick up some food. It was a bitterly cold day, with morning temperatures dipping to 3 deg C, which felt like 0 deg. I enjoyed the afternoon sipping wine and beer in the sun. In the evening, we went for a long walk. 

At the Dereham Marketplace	A quiet quaint road through Watton

11 April 2024

This was a relatively warm day, with afternoon temperatures touching 20 degrees C. We drove to Hunstanton Beach, which is an hour away. We had the first glimpse of the North Sea in the east of England. Describing the place as scenic would be an understatement. The beach, the lighthouse, the Hunstanton Cliff and the lush green pastures on a crisp sunny day gave us that out-of-the-world feel we were hoping for. We drove back to Richmond Park via Dereham to pick up some food for lunch.   

The Coastal town of Hunstanton	The Hunstanton beach and cliff
The Hunstanton Lighthouse	The jungle trail to the cliff

 

12 April 2024

Ripon is a beautiful little town in North Yorkshire. The hotel we got into was right in the middle of the city centre. Ripon, like all European small cities, had a typical cobblestone-paved city centre with a nearby cathedral and a town hall. Our hotel had a restaurant and bar on the ground floor, which, perhaps, was the most popular joint in Ripon. I judged it from the crowd it had. Ate fish and chips and beer for lunch. In the evening, we just wandered around on foot. We visited the Cathedral, which was so typical of any European cathedral. There is a picturesque canal cutting across Ripon. We walked by the canal and discovered a nice pub. Without much ado, we got into it more to save ourselves from the bitter chill than to drink some ale. That we ended up drinking lots of beer was incidental. 

The City Square of Ripon	Inside the Ripon Cathedral
The City Square at 11 pm.	The picturesque Ripon Canal.

 

13 April 2024

We drove up to Edinburgh, Scotland, which is about four hours away from Ripon. The highways in Scotland are better than those in England. The drive along the coastline of the North Sea was magnificent. The weather was alternately rainy and sunny. But the wind was strong all along. So much so that we could feel our large car sway when the wind hit across hard. There were also cautions on high winds along the motorways. There was signage on deer crossing highways for the motorists to be careful. Despite this, we found a lot of dead animals and birds run over by the speeding vehicles. The beauty of Scotland is superlative! God has used all of His artistic skills in this country. 

In Scotland, we rented an apartment located in the city of Dunfermline, which is about seventeen miles from Edinburgh. To reach Dunfermline, one has to cross the Queensferry Bridge over the Firth of Forth, an estuary of the North Sea. We could see the fantastic view of the Queensferry Crossing from afar as we approached. Our apartment belonged to one Ms Samantha. A cosy little annexe to where she lives. When we reached, she wasn’t at home, but she’d written an email on how to locate the key – which was nothing short of a treasure hunt game we used to play in our childhood. Something like – ‘Take the stairs adjacent to the main apartment, and you will find a picture by the side of the door which is not a picture, but a secret safe. Once you pull the frame, you shall see the safe. Today its combination is….”.

With some trepidation, we managed to locate the key. The annexe had a cosy bedroom and a living room fitted with all household equipment. There was a fat operating manual with elaborate instructions on how to operate the equipment! We stocked our fridge with a lot of food and drove to see the Edinburgh Cathedral from the outside.  

Approaching  Dunfermline	The Queensferry Bridge to Dunfermline
Our annexe in Dunfermline	A street in old Edinburgh

14 April 2024

Today was the Bengali New Year. I wonder why the Buddhiman Bengalis chose their hottest month for the New Year! Anyway, this time, for a change, we were in the Highlands of Scotland - a beautiful place called Glencoe. It was 3 hrs away from Edinburgh. Very cold and rainy, yet fantastic. The various Lochs along the way were pristine. The drive was long but fantastic. It was as if we were driving through a place called Heaven. The drive to Glencoe and back was close to 400 miles (650 km), but we did not feel weary at all. We took several stops for petrol, sandwiches and coffee, and also occasionally parked by the side of unknown lochs for power naps. A day well spent. 

On our way to Glencoe – by the side of a Loch of which I forgot the name…
Discovering the snow-capped mountains	Wild roses bloom by the street side

15 April 2024

We drove to Inverness, which is about 195 miles away from Dunfermline, where we are lodged. From Inverness, we took a boat cruise into the famous Loch Ness. The weather was very cold but sunny. The cruise was fantastic, even though we did not see the Loch Ness Monster! 

Post-dinner, I decided to take a solitary walk on the deserted streets of Dunfermline just to enjoy the 5-degree chill. Little did I know that my old body wouldn't be able to take that!

 

The icy calm beauty of Loch Ness	The Loch Ness Castle
No, it isn’t the Loch Ness monster emerging – it’s the propeller of the cruise boat	Another view of the serene Loch Ness

16 April 2024

Drove to the city of Edinburgh. I had a harrowing time to find a parking slot in the Waverly Station. And, no, it wasn't free - as was informed by Samantha, our landlady. We ended up paying 14 GBP for the parking. Meanwhile, we had a city bus tour and the whisky tour - which was fantastic. Our anchor, an American Chic, was even more fantastic. Got a free 25-drum whisky drink and the glass as a souvenir. The weather was pristine, but I wasn't feeling too well with a runny nose and itchy throat. Came back early. I proved a spoilsport. We – rather I – did not have the energy to get into Edinburgh Castle. A trivia: While walking to the Castle, we found a Bagpiper playing his pipe. Three hours later, when we returned at the same point, the guy was still playing!

The historic Edinburgh Castle	Bagpiper on a street in Edinburgh
A view of Edinburgh City from the Castle	A view of Edinburgh Streets.

 

 

17 April 2024

Bid goodbye to Dunfermline and drove off to Sunderland. A picturesque old port town by the river Wear. Our hotel - The Boar's Head - is a 300-year-old building where Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy were regular visitors. The landlady - Diana, a sweet old dame- upgraded us to the Laurel and Hardy Suite. The bedroom had exposed, weather-beaten timber, but the facilities were very modern. It also had a common kitchen for the guests to cook their meals. The Boar's Head is right on the river bank.  I loved this hotel so much that I did not mind postponing our London trip by a few more days. Alas, we were committed to returning our car the next day! A trivia: At the beachside after parking our car we found that the parking machine wasn’t working. It won’t accept coins, and it won’t accept my Forex card as well! I was sure they photographed me from somewhere, and the fines are pretty steep (100 pounds). So I had no choice but to ring up the helpline number on the machine. A guy with an intense Yorkshire accent answered. In my Bengali accent, I managed to explain my predicament. He asked for the car registration number, then said – ‘No worries, I’ll tell my guy not to bother you. You don’t have to pay.’    

The Laurel and Hardy Suite at the Boar’s Head. Notice the weathered wooden girder.	The pristine beach of Sunderland. Notice the lighthouse.
An evening view of River Wear from our room	A lonesome seagull soaring in the blues over the North Sea.

18 Apr 2024

Drove today from Sunderland to London Heathrow via the small apartment we booked at Colindale to return our hired car. We did more than 3000 miles (4800 km) from the South of England to the Highlands of Scotland and back. We had been to Richmond, Cambridge, Lincoln, Ripon, Dunfermline, Edinburgh, Glencoe, Inverness, Loch Ness, Sunderland and then back to London. While in London we shall use the Public Transport. 

I can say with conviction that London is the shittiest. Crowded, congested, and packed with Desis and our Mussalman Cousins of the East and West of our land. This meant littering, honking, and reversing anywhere on the roads. Crowded tubes, crowded parks, crowded streets, crowded everything! Gone was the pristine beauty of the UK countryside. I was sure I was going to hate the next few days. Looking forward to getting back to India on the 25th. 

One piece of advice - next time you visit Europe, hire a car and lodge somewhere in the pristine countryside.  

We took a studio apartment in Colindale, not too far away from Wembley in North London.

Churchill – the villain who caused the Great Indian Famine – looms large in a crowded park	The crowded Oxford Circus
View of the Thames from the London Eye	The iconic Hyde Park

19 April 2024

The day started badly but ended well. The weather in the morning was miserable. Took the tube to central London and was clueless for a while about what to do next. Boarded a National Rly train from Waterloo station for Windsor Castle, only to find out after boarding that there were no tkts available for the day. Returned after travelling two stations and lost a few pounds in the process. Travelled to Trafalgar Square to find a hop-in hop-off red bus. The whole square was cordoned off for some construction work (wonder what?). Gone was the beautiful square with those daredevil flocks of pigeons which would sit on your arms and feed from your palms. The whole place was miserable. It was crowded and rainy, and nobody whom we talked to had any idea where to get the bus from. Then we found a small souvenir shop which sold those tickets, but the bloke was so engaged in selling his wares that we had to walk off and take shelter under a building. And then, magically, things started going well. We hopped onto a City Sightseeing bus. Even got a 10% rebate because we had availed the same bus service at Cambridge. After a while, the weather cleared. The sun started shining brightly. We occupied the rooftop seats on the red bus and enjoyed the tourist spots of London. At the Tower of London, we hopped out and took the Thames Ferry to the Westminster Pier. The boat cruise was magnificent. We then again took the bus and dropped off at Piccadilly Circus. The wife wanted to visit the famous Hard Rock Cafe. We had some chicken wings and a lot of sauvignon blanc and beer.

A trivia: That the famous Tower Bridge over the Thames is retractable from both ends to allow a big ship to navigate is known to all. The shipping company has to provide a 24-hour notice to the Bridge Authorities because closing such an important bridge, even for a couple of hours, can be a logistical and administrative nightmare. And this service is done for free, which is a rarity in London where they charge you for almost everything. 

 

The Tower Bridge	The Big Ben, Westminster Abby and House of Commons from the London Eye.
Hard Rock Café – Piccadilly Circus	The London Eye from the Southern Bank

20 Apr 2024

The beautiful weather continued. We continued with our hop-on hop-off sightseeing in the morning and got down at Buckingham Palace. The courtyard outside the palace was teeming with tourists from, perhaps, every corner of the world. The chilly weather with bright sunshine made the environment festive and tolerable. However, I am sure that had I been amongst that big a crowd in India, I would have hated it, no matter how beautiful a place it was. We saw the famous change of guards through the iron bars just as one sees animals in a zoo. 

Then we took a train to Greenwich. The park where the famous time meridian and the observatory are located was nice and sprawling. From atop a large part of the city of London was visible. On our way back, we took a ferry straight to the London Eye. The weather held, so the London Eye experience was spectacular. The wife loved it. On our way back, we got into a sports bar for a couple of draughts in the tunnel under the Waterloo Station. 

The Buckingham Palace	Observatory Park – Greenwich
The Greenwich Observatory – notice the copper strip on the floor. The far side is the West (Occident), and the nearer side is the East (Orient).	The Clock which controls the time of the world! Kind of complicated, no?
London City from Greenwich Observatory	London North Bank from the ferry to the London Eye Pier.

21 April 2024

We took a train to Windsor and Eton Riverside from Waterloo Station in the morning. We had our tickets booked for the famous Windsor Castle at noon, where we reached a bit early,  a bit apprehensive about our before-time arrival. But the authorities there were glad we came early. They had an event at noon, so they were closing early!

Got into the castle. It is truly magnificent. It takes you through the history of Britain's Royal Family since the year 1300 when Charles the First was the King. Exquisite showpieces, china, tapestry, artwork and armoury adorned the royal rooms. Each exhibit is rich with histories and anecdotes. The audio guide was also well worth it. But, alas, we were pushed and hurried to end our tour because of that unannounced event! Now, my question here to Britain's Royal Family - if you knew you had an event, why sell tickets for that day? And let me tell you - the tickets don't come cheap. Like everything else in the UK, they are costly. And is one of the main earning sources of the Royal Family. So, isn't it ethical that the visitors be allowed time to enjoy the walk and soak into the history? Announcing the event after selling tickets is nothing short of conning.

I left the Castle with a bitter feeling. Had an expensive lunch of fish and chips with draughts. Then visited the riverside. That was magnificent, with huge swans swimming majestically all around... 

No wonder the now-deceased Queen chose to spend most of her time at Windsor Castle instead of Buckingham Palace. 

The Windsor Castle – Venue for many a Royal Event to this date.
Inside the castle. They don’t allow photographs inside the Royal Quarters	Majestic swans on the tributary of the iconic Thames.

22 Apr 24

We did not have any plans for the morning. So after breakfast, we set out for the nearby Swami Narayan Temple - of which we had come to know through the advertisement of this apartment. Google, as usual, bungled in suggesting the bus stop, which left us wandering in the bitterly cold morning trying to locate the stop. And you will be surprised by the lack of local information that the local people have. When we were about to give up, we met an old Gujarathi Lady who told us how to get there. She also insisted we visit the Hindu Sanatan Temple at Wembley and also gave an accurate account of how to reach there. So, we took our first bus ride and visited both temples. At the Wembley Temple, which was excellent, we even got an opportunity to bathe Lord Shiva with milk and water! Now, what will you call this? Today, Monday, is the Lord's day! And here we were bathing Him with milk and water in a distant land. Who made us meet the old Gujarathi lady who gave us all the information?

Then we travelled to the London Bridge Underground station, where we had booked a spooky London Bridge History show. The show was so-so. 

The BAPS Swami Narayan Temple, Colindale.
The Sanatan Temple, Wembley, we found deities of almost all Gods and Goddesses.

23 April 24

This was the penultimate day of our UK sojourn. The morning was gloomy, chilly with fine drizzles. We had a 10:00 AM show for Madame Tussauds at Baker Street. Some exhibits were great, some were ordinary. I discovered a Sachin Tendulkar who was taller than me. Had a peek at Priyanka Chopra's breasts. The journey through London's history was interesting, as was the Chamber of Horrors (The English have a penchant for horrors, murderers, villains, ghosts and ghouls). The 5D show of Superheros was superb. 

In the second half, we had tickets for Agatha Christie's whodunit The Mousetrap – supposedly the World's longest-running show – at the St. Martin’s Theatre. In its 72nd year, the show ran to a packed house. The ambience was terrific, even though I did not find the play too extraordinary. It is important not to carry too many expectations for anything, perhaps.  

All the waxen Bonds…	St. Martin’s Theatre – The Mousetrap running in its 72nd year.
At the lobby. At 65 pounds a ticket for the stalls, I wouldn’t call the show a paisa-wasool.	House-full on the 29575th show on a weekday matinee.

24 April 24

Our Air India flight was at 9:40 in the evening. Our landlord was kind enough to allow us a late checkout, but as a trade-off, we have to give him a good review!

One piece of advice: if you have to move around in Uber in the UK, please reinstall the Uber app on your UK number. In London, one cannot hire an Uber with cash payment. And the India-installed Uber won't accept Forex cards in London. We had a really hard time getting an Uber. Finally, we requested the neighbourhood grocery store Gujju woman to book an Uber for us, and we paid her in cash. 50 pounds to Heathrow - now that's costly for a one-hour ride!

One trivia - there is no passport control for people flying out of the UK. Initially, I found this a bit weird, but after a good thought, I realised it is redundant. Why would any country be bothered by the travellers who are exiting their land? Or perhaps they can automatically track it from the data while entering the UK - I do not know. But this is a practice we can adopt. 

Slugged a lot of draught beer at the airport before boarding the flight back to my homeland.